Stitchin', Schoolin' and Stuff

~Christmas is FAST approaching!~

2007-12-23T03:23:00.000-08:00

Man, has it snuck up on me this year. I haven't been able to do 1/3 of what I normally do. ~sigh~ Next year for sure!!

Here is a picture my Mom took the other night of half of my crew. Baby T and Little D - cute huh? LOL

~When will this week end???~

2007-12-14T23:19:00.000-08:00

I have had the worst week so far! I don't know how much more crying I can do. Aside from this being the week of my brother's death last year, I am also facing several personal situations that are very taxing on me. I am almost to the point of burying my head and not coming out until it is a new year. ~sigh~ I know there are times in everyone's life where something leads them to step back, look around, re-evaluate and look up for guidance. That is me, right now... with eyes skyward praying for guidance.

God, grant me strength and wisdom. Amen.

~One year today...~

2007-12-12T04:33:00.001-08:00

I miss you, Aaron...

~Happy Birthday Aaron...~

2007-11-26T11:01:00.001-08:00

Love Update 11/11

2007-11-11T09:28:00.000-08:00

And for those that love to see Miss T... she just came in saying "Dat's FUN-neee Mommy!" and this is what I saw...

~Happy Halloween!~

2007-10-31T22:38:00.001-07:00

From my bunch to yours!!!

~PARTY TIME~ My baby turned TWO!!!

2007-10-30T19:52:00.000-07:00

Two parties for TWO years old... She loved all of the presents but hated the singing. hehehe - Enjoy the pictures!

~No Comment...~

2007-10-23T09:13:00.000-07:00

~BayFest 2007~

2007-10-09T21:53:00.000-07:00

We went to BayFest this past weekend. It is a large outdoor music festival. The older boys volunteer with our Homeschool group in the children's area during the day so as a benefit, we get to go to the concerts free. Little D and Baby T had a blast both days but Sunday was especially fun. Baby T took a liking to the Azalea Trail Maids.

As did Little D who called them "Princesses"...

Sunday was the Big and Rich concert. We were unsure how long we would get to stay since Baby T has never been to a concert. Well, imagine our surprise when Daddy put her on his shoulders for Cowboy Troy and she started dancing and carrying on... she would wiggle her shoulders, bob her hand, clap her hands and wave her arms back and forth. The people around us laughed at her until the cried. People were approaching us and asking could they take pictures and videos. It was too funny. By the end of the night, when Daddy tired out, he put her down and she continued to amuse the people around us by dancing with them The people in the picture are from Liverpool and wanted to take home with them! LOL She lasted the whole concert and was a doll. Amazing coming from a two year old. Enjoy the pictures!

~Love in Blue~ 09/28/07

2007-09-28T07:42:00.000-07:00

~Happy Birthday to me....~

2007-09-25T20:17:00.000-07:00

Here I am at 3 years old.

I turned 37 today. Some days I feel older but most days I can't believe I am that old! It was a little tearful though when I realized that I wouldn't have my usual voicemail from Aaron telling "Happy Birthday". I sure do miss him.

~Love in Blue~ 09/21N

2007-09-22T09:28:00.000-07:00

Not much progress this week! It has been a busy week. I got a PT job checking at WinnDixie which I am enjoying. It does get me home late though so my stitching is suffering. And since we had new babies this week (yeah!!), things were kinda crazy all the way around. LOL

On another note... Mikayla Inez and Aaryn Viola entered the world on the 18th. They were 5.12 and 5.5. Aaryn is doing well but Mikayla is still in the NICO with air in her intestines. Hopefully, she will be out today. Mom was doing well and then suffered from eclampsia and seizures. After 2 days in ICU, she is now out and doesn't remember a thing!! Please say a prayer for Mom and babies for good health so that everyone can come home on Monday. Thanks!

~Love Update as of 09/14~

2007-09-14T08:14:00.001-07:00

~Love in Blue~ 09/07/07

2007-09-07T07:12:00.000-07:00

Bring on the babies!!!

2007-09-01T22:35:00.000-07:00

My cousin M is having twin little girls. They have told her they will take them in the next 2-3 weeks. All I need to do is add their names and birthdate once they get here. I am so excited for her!!

This is done on 28ct white jobelan with VC's Lavender & Roses Silk.

~Love in Blue~ Update 08/30

2007-08-30T19:44:00.000-07:00

~Love~ Take Deaux...

2007-08-24T13:08:00.000-07:00

This one is for my parents. I would love to have it done by Christmas. It is being done with VC silks (of course) in Xeon and Oil of Amber on 28ct Ivory Jobelan.

~THE NAME OF GOD~ Completed!!!

2007-08-21T22:13:00.000-07:00

I finished The Name of God. 98 days start to finish! YEAH! My second large piece this year. I think I am going to ask D to have it framed for me for my upcoming birthday. I love it and I am so happy with how it turned out!!!

ETA: This is by My Big Toe Designs.

One word answers, taken from V!

2007-08-17T21:55:00.000-07:00

1. Where is your Cellphone? - purse
2. Relationship? - together
3. Your Hair? - brown
4. Work? - unemployed
5. Your sister? - younger
6. Your favorite thing? - children
7. Your dream last night? - stupid
8. Your favorite drink? - coke
9. Your dream car? - paid
10. The room you’re in? - livingroom
11. Your shoes? - sandals
12. Your fears? - numerous
13. What do you want to be in 10 years? - happy
14. Who did you hang out with this weekend? - family
15. What are you not good at? - friendship
16. Muffin? - banana
17. One of your wish list items? - house
18. Where you grew up? - 'Bama
19. Last thing you did? - surfed
20. What are you wearing? - shorts
21. What aren’t you wearing? - socks
22. Your pet? - none
23. Your computer? - on
24. Your life? - busy
25. Your mood? - sleepless
26. Missing? Aaron
27. What are you thinking about right now? - school
28. Your car? - blue
29. Your kitchen? - messy
30. Your summer? - humid
31. Your favorite color? - yellow
32. Last time you laughed? - today
33. Last time you cried? yesterday
34. School? - daily
35. Love? unconditional

~Name of God Update 08/17~

2007-08-17T21:52:00.001-07:00

~Countdown begins...~

2007-08-11T20:39:00.000-07:00

Well, we start school next Thursday. Little D is soooo ready - he has been driving me crazy to start. The older boys are okay - they are excited about the things we have going on with the homeschool group this year. Oh, did I mention I am now on the Board of Directors? Nothing like jumping in feet first, huh?

I have been worried about baby T and how she will act during our school time. Luckily, she has discovered a new passion and can sit for up to one hour. I even made her some "school sheets". Here is a little peek at my sweetie.

And I can't leave out little D... he is a motor mouth if I ever had one. He can talk your ear off. So, here he is in a down moment, not talking.

Believe me, if those big brown eyes were open, his mouth would be too! LOL

~Heeeyyyyy....~

2007-08-03T16:33:00.000-07:00

If only being this excited was contagious. LOL

~Name of God Update 07/30~

2007-07-30T20:35:00.000-07:00

Only two more pages!!!

~Why she gets her way...~

2007-07-09T19:03:00.000-07:00

In case you were wondering...

~NOG as of July 6th~

2007-07-06T07:19:00.000-07:00

Not too much more now!!

~NOG as of June 29th~

2007-06-29T07:06:00.000-07:00

~Finish for D's Mom~

2007-06-20T22:24:00.001-07:00

We are going to GA this weekend for her birthday. I wanted to stitch a little something and I thought she would like it. It is by My Big Toe Designs. I stitched it on hand dyed Potpourri Jobelan from Silkweavers with Victoria Clayton's silk in Mountain Shadow.

~Marketing Mixup?? ~

2007-06-16T18:59:00.000-07:00

Tonight we went to WalMart. While buying diapers we had to pass through the children's clothing section. As we passed a rack, Little T started yelling "Deeena (Dora)! Deigo! Deeena! Deigo!" Soooo... I pulled each pair out. One was pink and yellow ruffled with Dora on the front - the other was various colors of blue with Deigo on the front. Very obviously GIRL and BOY. I gave her a choice...

Perhaps Nick Jr has their marketing wrong. hehehehe

Where is the time going???

2007-06-15T13:55:00.000-07:00

Today after hair cuts...

And in 1999...

They are growing up WAY too fast!! ~sigh~

The Name of God - weekly update... 06/15

2007-06-15T10:41:00.000-07:00

~NOG as of June 6th~

2007-06-06T21:46:00.000-07:00

1/3rd the way completed!

~NOG as of June 1st~

2007-06-01T07:41:00.000-07:00

~New Project... The Name of God~

2007-05-25T20:13:00.000-07:00

I started my new big project on May 15th. It is The Name of God by My Big Toe Designs. It is being done on 28ct Lambswool Jobelan with Victoria Clayton silks in JewelWeed and Buckwheat Honey. The Buckwheat has a beautiful sheen to it in person. I am loving Vikki's silks. The quality, along with her excellent customer service makes me an addict. LOL

Here is the picture from today.

and how it looked on May 18th.

I am really enjoying this one. The border is a little more intensive than Love so it will surely take longer.

~My Awwww... Moment for Today...~

2007-05-24T21:13:00.000-07:00

We are driving to little D's teeball game. He is talking to Gran (MIL) on his Daddy's cell phone. Then, he wanted to talk to his Aunt. As he is talking to her, I guess she wanted to know where Baby T was and what she was doing. Little D says so very sweetly... "She is sitting right in her seat, looking at me with those big beautiful eyes." My heart just melted. Ok, so we do talk a lot about her eyes and other people comment on them but for a 6 year old to pick that up and translate it into his own terms, it was just very sweet.

And, to go with that comment... here are those big, beautiful eyes.

Oh, and here is the person responsible for that comment. Having just lost another tooth, he has big, beautiful eyes too! LOL

Tag... I'm it...

2007-05-09T05:44:00.000-07:00

I have been tagged by Mipa. The biggest problem being that I don't have 7 others to tag as most of who I do know has already been tapped - lol. Hmmmm.... so I tag the only people I know that haven't been: Jaime Jill Jen Michelle and Venessa

Here are the rules: Each player starts with 7 random facts/habits about themselves. People who are tagged need to write on their own blog about their seven things, as well as these rules. You need to choose 7 people to get tagged and list their names. Don’t forget to leave them a comment telling them they have been tagged and to read your blog!

1) I worked as a Police Cadet out of High School. I wanted to be a police officer but decided after 2 years that I wanted to be a Mommy more and didn't want my children to wonder if I would be coming home each day.

2) I am an aspiring Country Singer. I wish American Idol had been around when I was younger. LOL

3) I didn't learn to cook until I was 18, out on my own and hungry. ;)

4) Most of my friends live in my computer vs IRL. I feel like some of my online friends are truer and know me better than the few I have IRL.

5) I am a horrible housekeeper. When I read about people making beds daily and doing spring cleaning, I feel less than adequate.

6) My exDH is actually one of my best friends. Sometimes I do want to clobber him, though.

7) Smacking when eating, turning up a glass several times when it is empty so that the ice clangs and my DH biting his fingernails are my worst pet peeves.

Whew - that was harder than I thought. Thanks, MiPa.

~Love is complete!~ 05/05

2007-05-05T19:01:00.001-07:00

~Love Update as of 04/24~

2007-04-24T11:58:00.000-07:00

Only 3 more pages left!!! I am so excited. This has been a pleasure to stitch.

~Love Update as of 04/16!~

2007-04-16T20:33:00.000-07:00

Halfway done! I am really enjoying this pattern much more than I would have ever imagined.

~Love Update as of 04/05!~

2007-04-07T06:57:00.000-07:00

I am really enjoying this piece. In fact, I am not wanting to work on anything else. LOL

Love with a Capital L Update!

2007-03-30T11:54:00.000-07:00

Here is my baby - I have been working on this for our bedroom. Something has been driving me to do this and hang it in my bedroom next to my bedroom suite that was my brother's...

~School Days.... School Dazeeee~

2007-03-10T20:39:00.000-08:00

133. One hundred thirty-three days. That is the number of days on my roll as of Friday. We have been homeschooling for 133 days. We have made it through holidays, 2 funerals and 1 broken arm. We have laughed, we have cried, we have done experiments and spelling bees... we sailed with Long John Silver to Treasure Island, built castles and completed more Math than I care to mention.

Friday the one that fought spelling tests last year and never got anything above a 70 got a 100. He was also a reluctant reader and now doesn't even use the a timer anymore for his 30 mins of required reading. Why? Because I usually have to tell him it is time to stop. LOL

My studious, book loving, book smart one just keeps exceeding my expectations. He laps up things as fast as I can give them. He also tutors his brother when needed. When he is done with his assigned work, sometimes he even asks if he can go ahead. :o)

And my little one, the one we debated on for so long to bring home from Public School is adding and subtracting like a little calculator. No trip in the car is complete with math facts flying. He is also reading like a champ.

I am truly, truly blessed. And, they want to continue - as do I.

I overhead Big D telling someone about homeschooling on the phone the other day. He was spouting off all of the information I thought he had ignored when I presented him with the facts about homeschooling and how it may be a good fit for us. Then he said "Hey, it is really working for us!" And I smiled - it IS really working for us.

~Toxic People..~

2007-03-06T19:14:00.000-08:00

I am a firm believer in the fact that there ARE toxic people in this world. What may be toxic for one person may not be for another. By nature, I seem to attract toxic people. I love all of my online friends and aside from ONE incident, I have rarely had a toxic online relationship. In real life? Well, that is a totally different story. D says that he thinks these sort of people are drawn to me. I love having friends. I want so much to be close to someone. Someone who I can laugh with, cry with and share with - someone with my same beliefs and family values. Someone who will keep my deepest secrets but not want to totally consume me. That has been the problem. Total comsumption. I can't seem to find a friend that will just stay a phone, visit, meet for coffee friend. I find people who attach themselves to me and want to completely smother me. Then, when I try to remove myself from them, it is all about how horrible I am. I have been told I am not a "girl's girl"- that women need and want total consumption friends - at least one in their life. I don't think that is true. I am in the process of trying to remove myself from one now. I have had a lot happen over the past few months but instead of giving me time and stepping back and letting me come to her when I need something, she has bombarded me. I have even sat her down and explained to her how I feel but it didn't do any good.

D says that I am like that with all people. He says I HAVE to have a way out. He says that anytime I feel cornered and put in a box, I look for a way out. Maybe he is right. I don't know. I worry about not being a "girl's girl" though. How will that affect Miss T as she watches me for how to be a woman? Will I pass this along to her? Will she be a bad friend as I am? ~sigh~ So many questions...

Picture Day...

2007-03-03T00:04:00.000-08:00

Me, in case you didn't know what I look like. LOL

Annndddd.... it must RUN in the family. HA!

~Missing Someone~

2007-02-25T20:54:00.000-08:00

There are so many obvious signs when you miss someone. Whether it be through death as has happened with our family two times too many lately or just when you haven't talked to someone in a while.

Tonight I got a MySpace request from an old friend - someone I haven't even thought about in many, many years but it brought a smile to my face when I got the message and realized who it was. Friends are hard to come by and good friends, even harder. And the best friends are ones that even if you spend 20 years apart make you feel like you haven't missed a day!

Here's hoping for a great week and a quiet month to come!!

So much sadness...

2007-02-21T19:33:00.000-08:00

My Pawpaw has been in the hospital for the past week. He has been very sick. My Aunt just called to tell me that he has passed. In one way, I am so comforted that he is no longer suffering and I know that Aaron greeted him with open arms but in another way, I am so sad. I just don't know how much more my family can take - things have been so rough lately.

My Pawpaw was the reason I became a Police Cadet, he was so proud of me. He used to brag to people about it. He loved being in Law Enforcement. He could be a PITA but hey, can't we all at some point?

Saddest of all is that today is my Meme's 75th birthday... I am so worried about her. She knew it was coming but it can't be easy. I know it isn't for me.

God Speed, Pawpaw, I love you.

~Another Mardi Gras down...~

2007-02-20T20:25:00.000-08:00

Mardi Gras was never one of my ideal times of year. The last job I had required me to be very involved so after 2 years of that - I was happy to avoid all of the parades, crowds and such. Best of all, my kids didn't even miss it. Thank goodness!

This should be a good week. My Grandparents from Dothan are coming in town Friday and Saturday and Saturday night is my Meme's 75th Birthday party. Should be fun!

Hopefully Big D will be feeling better by then - he has been home from work since Sunday. Older D is getting a cold and he hardly ever gets sick. T's arm is doing well. Oh, and I signed little D up to participate in Kindergarten graduation with our homeschool group so we are excited about that!

I should have a stitchy update soon so be watching.

~A Day of LOVE....~

2007-02-14T06:06:00.000-08:00

LOL

This is one of my favorite holidays - no idea why because I usually don't get anything. I think I love the IDEA of the day.

So, to all my friends and family, I say HAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY!!!!

Menu Plan Monday

2007-02-12T06:50:00.000-08:00

The last few times I have done this, something has happened that same week... I am hoping my luck has changed - LOL!

This is from Organizing Junkie

Monday - Crockpot Pot Roast with Carrots and Potatoes
Tuesday - Red Beans & Rice
Wednesday - BBQ Chicken & Corn on the Cob
Thursday - Out to Eat - Ruth's Chris for Valentine's Day (yeah!)
Friday - Meatloaf
Saturday - Spaghetti, Salad & Garlic Bread
Sunday - Pork Roast, Potatoes & Cabbage

Here's hoping for a GREAT week!!!

~Best Thing/Worst Thing~

2007-02-05T20:18:00.000-08:00

On one of the boards I visit someone ask the question 'What was the one your parents did that you wouldn't?'. Of course, later someone else posted 'What was the best thing your parents did?'. I read the replies to the first with great interest. People listed things like getting divorced, smoke, washing mouth out with soap, etc. I didn't bother posting my response. I think parenting is a learning experience. Whether you have 1 or 10 children - you learn as you go. I learned a lot from my Mom, who learned a lot from my Meme, who learned a lot from my Mamaw and so on. But, we are all human and make mistakes. Sure, my Mom did things as a parent that I don't BUT we are different people AND our kids are different. She was a working single Mom when I was little and then later on she was a married working Mom of two. I am a stay at home, homeschooling Mom of four. Just that makes our situations different and thus, our parenting different. The things I remember are not the mistakes my Mom made, although I am sure she made her fair share just as I have with my children. I remember her being there for me, loving me and silly things like taking me to a professional makeup counter the first time I wanted to wear makeup or letting me have a boy-girl party at 13. But what I remember most of all is her showing me what a strong, independent woman is capable of... she is a special woman and I love her. Of course, I tell her all the time the BEST thing she ever did for me was marry my step-Dad who is, in my heart, my Dad. I have never been less than his daughter and he has never been less than wonderful to me. I only hope that my kids will one day say that they learned from me and remember all of the good things. And, know that I love them.

When my Mom got sick, people commented on how strong I was during the time when we didn't know if she would make it. When my brother died, again, people commented on my strength. My Mom just told me the other day that I would be fine when she isn't here any more because I am a rock. That makes me smile - not because I want to lose her (I shiver at the thought) but because she doesn't even realize that SHE is the reason I am strong.

Her being my Mom. That is why I am who I am. That is why I am strong. She is my strength. I love you, Mom.

~Super Bowl~ Super Win~

2007-02-05T06:35:00.000-08:00

COLTS WIN!!!

And once again Aaron is beaming from above! He was a football fan - a HUGE football fan. His favorite team was the Gators followed by the Colts. What a year for his teams! I just wish he was here to see it with us but I know he was watching.

I love you, Raaron!

How does a homeschooler?

2007-02-02T19:49:00.000-08:00

I thought this was hysterical!!! It sounds a bit like MY house. Does it sounds like yours?

Q: How does a Homeschooler change a light bulb?

A: First, mom checks three books on electricity out of the library, then the kids make models of light bulbs, read a biography of Thomas Edison and do a skit based on his life.

Next, everyone studies the history of lighting methods, wrapping up with dipping their own candles.

Next, everyone takes a trip to the store where they compare types of light bulbs as well as prices and figure out how much change they'll get if they buy two bulbs for $1.99 and pay with a five dollar bill.

On the way home, a discussion develops over the history of money and also Abraham Lincoln, as his picture is on the five dollar bill.

Finally, after building a homemade ladder out of branches dragged from the woods, the light bulb is installed.
And there is light.

My Pony Girl...

2007-02-02T11:34:00.000-08:00

She is FINALLY getting enough hair to actually do something with. Now, if she will just leave it alone. LOL

~Math Whiz Not Found...~

2007-02-01T19:34:00.000-08:00

At least not in THIS Mom!! D is already at a higher level Math than I completed in High School. With T having his arm in a splint, I am having to do all of his writing. Lucky for me, HIS Math I know how to do. LOL

But, that brings me to next year. Yes, yet another sign I am officially a homeschooler as I have started researching already on the subjects where I wish to change programs. Math is one of them. For Little D, I may go ahead and order a 1st grade program now since that is his strong point and I can bribe him to do his writing sheets by bargaining with Math sheets - Bad Mommy - LOL! For him I am looking at Math U See, Miquon and Making Math Meaningful. All of them look great, I am just not sure which is best. For T, I am in a bit of a quandry. This year he is doing a program I found online for free and honestly, it is mostly review for him as well as strengthing some skills he was weak in - Math is one of his better subjects. I need to figure out a good 7th grade program for him and I really have no idea what that might be at this point. D has decided he wants to do Geometry next year. Since I am not a Math person, I need something that has the most assistance for ME I can find. This year he has been using Saxon for Algebra I because of the DIVE Cd which he has used all of twice I think. Neither of us like the program as they are little vague on some things and vary the extent to which they want things worked out from problem to problem. Confusing for me and him! So for now, I am open to suggestions. I am pretty sure I know what direction we are heading in everything else (with the exception of T's Science) but this one area is a stumbling block/guessing game.

On another note, my Mom and Dad are coming for dinner tomorrow - YEAH! The kids are excited. Of course, that means cleaning like fools tomorrow and also that they won't stay too long because of the drive from their house to ours ~sigh~. We are looking forward to seeing them.

~Recent Finish and "Got Milk?"~

2007-01-30T18:22:00.000-08:00

On one of the cross stitch boards I frequent they have been passing around a chart as a Pay It Forward. You stitch it and then hold a drawing for someone else who then stitches it and passes it on. I have no idea what I wanted it, I just think it is interesting. Anyway, here is my finished Picasso's Rooster. Now, what in the world I will do with it, I have no clue. LOL

Oh, and here is a pic of baby T that Daddy took - Got Milk???

"You know, we should have...."

2007-01-28T20:36:00.000-08:00

Today D and I cleaned out our room and threw away tons of clothes in preparation of moving our dresser to the older boys room. We are buying my brother's bedroom suite from my parents so they can use the money towards his headstone. While cleaning out the closet we ran across lots of boxes with pictures and papers and just various junk. If we ever need 3 copies of our marriage license we have them and they are now all in one place. Well, in some box in our closet but all together nonetheless.

While looking through pictures D made the comment that we should have stayed in the apartment complex in Dothan when I got pregnant with little D and just moved to a bigger one. My comment was "there are probably lots of things we could have done but we didn't..." Thinking about it though, if we had chosen to do that, things may have been considerably different. Better? Maybe - NO - probably not. Who is to know? We can both count our what-ifs and should-haves in the thousands and most of them would have not led us to each other. I can start my what-if, could-have, should-haves from the day after I graduated highschool. Would my life be all together different? Well, I think so.

To be perfectly honest though, I am glad it isn't. I am glad I chose the roads I did. I am glad I walked down the paths that have crossed me - even the ones that led to heartache, pain and despair. I would not be the person I am today if I had chosen differently. I probably would not have 4 beautiful, wonderful children that I cherish and adore. I probably would not have the strong faith that continues to grow in me each day and I know I would not have the peace I have now. How do I know? Because I am happy. Things don't always go my way but I am happy, I am blessed. My road lately has been rocky, my eyes have shed more than their fair share of tears and my heart has been heavy at times but through it all I continue to pray and thank Him for all that I have been blessed with in this life. He gives me strength even through my not so brilliant choices. He shows me that even at the end of bad choices and awful situations are loving hugs, open hearts, lessons learned and lives enriched.

What might have been? I don't know and honestly, I don't care to! It couldn't possibly be any better.

The Wedding Sampler

2007-01-27T20:57:00.000-08:00

Big D never takes too much of an interest in my stitching. The closest he has ever come is 1) rolling his eyes when I get new stash in the mail and 2) mentioning that I haven't ever stitched for him when I make a gift for someone else. Well, in November we got an invitation to a wedding for a friend he works with... the couple has been together forever and have two children but had never actually gotten married. With invite in hand, D casually mentioned that maybe I could make them something "you know, like a stitched something". I was excited that he had made the request so I labored for a few days over the perfect pattern, fabric, etc. I started the piece and daily, I kid you not, DAILY he would ask my progress. I has gotten about 3/4's the way done. Then Aaron passed and I had to put it on hold. When I got ready to stitch again, right before Christmas, he then requested I stitch an Elvis pattern for his sister that I had printed a month or so earlier. So, I stitched that for our Christmas with his family. The wedding came and went without the gift being completed. I finally picked it up again and now it is DONE!!! It is done an ice blue fabric with Snowflake thread (hints of blue and pink). I had added some blue in and thought it was done. Today I went back in and accented with pink which made a HUGE difference. Now to get it framed without screwing it up. ROTFL I sure hope they like it!

~The Best Teenager in the World...~

2007-01-26T20:12:00.000-08:00

Lives at my house. He is 13. He is tall and slender and wears glasses. He is intelligent. He knows more about some things (like Math) than I ever will. If he doesn't know he questions - he learns - he finds out. He doesn't care about what is popular in music or clothing. He certainly doesn't care about girls or cars or bikes.

In all seriousness, he is probably the best kid in the world. He is polite and compassionate. He doesn't talk back, he doesn't disobey and I mean that, he doesn't have it in him to be disrespectful or disobey. It wouldn't be right. And it wouldn't be fair to me or him. He would tell you that too! When someone offers him something he ask me first. He tells me every move he makes, he even ask if he can be excused to the restroom when we are at a restaurant.

One of our neighbors once told my Meme that she had never met a kid like him. She ask did my boys want to come into her house to play and he told her that he had to go and ask his Mom first. She was in shock. This week my Mom accompanied me to the doctors office to sit with the kids during my appointment. While I was out, she started giving baby T bits of Starburst. D told her to please excuse him and that he wasn't trying to be rude but that he didn't think I would approve of her eating the candy. He said that I might not appreciate her giving the baby sugar and that I generally didn't allow them candy before a meal - lunch in this case. My Mom laughed it off but made sure to tell me it had happened. What can I say, he knows the rules and lives and breathes them. And before someone thinks he was being rude, he wasn't. He is very matter of fact in his tone and his language but never rude. He talks as if he is about 40 years old.

And he doesn't lie. I know, a kid that doesn't like? Impossible, right? Nope. Not this kid. He doesn't lie. Not even to his brothers about something silly. He may get mad at them and fight with them but he doesn't lie to them. Lying in his opinion is a sin against yourself and against God. There is no good reason to lie. Not even about Santa or the ToothFairy or the Easter Bunny. That is a whole other discussion! LOL

Now, does he forget things? Yes. Do I have remind him several times about things like chores, medicines, brushing his teeth? Yes. Does he get into trouble? Sometimes but very rarely and it is usually small things like forgetting things. He always apologizes when he does something wrong even before I know about it in some cases. He reminds me when I forget things and always points out if something isn't like it should be. But, he is always polite about it and never, ever rude.

How did I get so lucky? Well, I have no clue. He isn't your normal child - he isn't your normal teenager. He is special. He has Asperger's which probably has something to do with how he is but I know in my heart that isn't totally why. He is just the best kid in the world. I consider myself so lucky to have him. I look at my others and feel like I am getting it easy now because I have lots of typical teenage days ahead of me.

Someday he will make someone very happy, someday he will be a wonderful Dad, but today he is only my son. He is perfect and I love him.

~Playing Favorites~ or Who loves you, baby?

2007-01-23T15:48:00.000-08:00

I think we all have favorites - favorite food, favorite color, favorite tv show, favorite song and even a favorite relative. But, what Mother would honestly say they had a favorite child? Well, aside from a Mother of an only! LOL

The day after my brother passed, in one of my Mom's few moments of clarity during the aftermath, she stopped me in the kitchen. She looked deep into my eyes and said "You know I love you, right? More than anything in the world." I told her of course I knew that! She then followed up with "I don't want you to think I love your brother more because I am so upset." I was heartbroken and started crying. As a Mother I knew she had lost part of her heart and yet, she was worried about me thinking he was her favorite or that somehow she loved him more than me. I explained to her later that I would have been mad if she hadn't been as upset as she was those days. Aaron was her baby - she and I are best friends. Her relationship with me is, by nature, so much different than the one she had with him.I can relate to that as I look at my own bunch.

Fast forward to a few weeks ago, I came out of the store to find D and little D discussing something in the car. When I got in, D informed me that Little D thought we loved Baby T more than him. She is the "favorite" in his mind. I told him that was not the case at all and Little D replied "Good, because I didn't want to think that was true!" I didn't give it another thought. Well, yesterday morning I was laying on the couch asleep. Little D was laying at my feet as usual and Baby T was asleep in the bouncy chair next to me. At some point she woke up and Little D started getting in her face, trying to hug her, basically just bugging her. She started screeching so I ask him to please leave her be and suggested he go into his room and watch tv. He left the room or so I thought. Baby T tugged on my arm so I leaned down and hugged her, patting her back. When I raised up, Little D was standing in the hallway with huge teary eyes. He started crying. Then, he looked at me, with all seriousness and said "See, I KNEW it was true, you DO love her more than me!" Mommy meltdown.

I was heartbroken. The fact that my child could possibly think for one second that I loved any one of them better than the other was terrible. Unthinkable. What had I done to make him think that - how horrible a Mother could I possibly be for him to feel this way? I called him out and explained to him that she is a baby, he is a big boy, they have different needs, etc. I love you all the same. Mommy's can do that, God gives us lots of love for our children even when they are not so perfect. In Mommy's eyes, all of her children are special. He was better after that and went off happily playing. He returned later with a handwritten note for me that said "You aRe SweeT". I had to smile. But somehow, the silly conversation with my Mom took new meaning.

Now, as a mother, daughter and a sibling, these two events have been floating around in my mind. As a Daughter I love my Mom so much and having her think that I would ever question her love for me gives me great pause. As a sibling, I always knew that my brother's role in our family was different from mine. As a child, I don't know if I totally understood and I am sure there were many times that, like Little D, I felt the jealous tug. As I look at my children, I can only hope that one day they will understand that I love them all the same amount but in different ways because they are different people. I am hoping that I do not have the wrong approach to loving my children. I might have one that is closer to me in interests, one that I can talk to and relate to emotionally, one that makes me laugh, one that challenges me and four that just make me happy to be a Mom.

I hope that I never have to see that look on one of my children's face again and I really hope that I don't ever have to look at one of them the way my Mom looked at me and try to explain my grief in losing one of them. My love is endless and overflowing and just when I don't think I can love anymore, God grants me a small gift, a special moment, a giggle, a smile or a wonderful conversation... something that reminds me that just as he has unlimited, unconditional love for us, he has given me that same capacity as a Mother.

So, who loves you, baby? Mommy, that's who!

2007 Stitching Plans

2007-01-22T09:39:00.000-08:00

These are the projects I would like to work on for 2007:

Gator Logo & Aaron Name Tree for my parents (start & finish this year)
Love with a Capital L (start on)
HAED Libra QS (continue from last year)
HAED Gathering Dew (continue from last year)
Confederate Piece (start & finish for D's birthday - October)
House Rules (start on)
Sunflower Sampler (complete)
Wedding Sampler (almost complete, frame and give to friends)

I will also be finishing up 12 Ladies Stitching RR and Story RR from last year as well as participating in Finishers 3.

WOW, that looks like a LOT all written out, doesn't it? LOL

Super Bowl Bound...

2007-01-21T20:18:00.000-08:00

Boy, my baby brother has been busy from his cloud up there. His Colts won tonight!!! I have never been into sports but have a new appreciation. I know he loved football and at times I can see why. What an exciting game!! And COLTS WIN!!!

Shine on, Aaron, shine on!!! I love you!

The Wonderful World Wide Web

2007-01-20T20:46:00.000-08:00

You meet so many people... people your age, people not your age, people from your past, people who live near you, people who live on the other end of the world, people with your same interests and in my case...

People with my same interests who live close to me AND who have children that look like they could be related to mine! ROTFL

AMAZING!

Missing Aaron today...

2007-01-18T21:01:00.000-08:00

We thought of you today,
But that is nothing new
We thought of you yesterday
And will tomorrow, too.

We think of you in silence
And make no outward show.
For what it meant to lose you
Only those who love you know.

Remembering you is easy,
We do it everyday.
It's the heartache of losing you
That will never go away.

~author unknown

50th post!

2007-01-18T09:06:00.000-08:00

Wow, I didn't think I could keep this up that long. Cookie for me! ROTFL

I guess I need to do a "50 Things..." post in honor. Tell you what - comment with your suggestions, I will pick one and edit this post to include my answers.

Boy, am I asking for trouble or what??? hehe

5 Hospital Days...

2007-01-14T21:14:00.000-08:00

We made it home tonight from our 5 day hospital stay. Just me and T hanging out while Big D had the other 3 at home. Last night T and I had an amazing conversation. Earlier in the day when my Aunt came to visit him she was asking him about going home - I chimed in and said that I was sure he was ready to go home because he was probably sick of all the "Mommy time". He looked at me so seriously, with eyes so full of love and quietly said "No, I love being with you. I could be here with you all the time!" My Aunt said Awwww... which made him blush. He then added that if baby T was here too, it would be perfect and he would never want to leave. This made me smile because through surgery, bad hospital food, having to be bathed by Mom and being stuck in a bed he only thought of it as wonderful because he got to be with me. It was just that simple.

He ask me if we could start our "date nights" again like we did when we lived in Texas. Once, every other week, I would take one boy out with me for a "date" - when we moved back to Alabama, we stopped them. I told him we could surely start them again! Tonight after we got home, he didn't run off to play games (or rather watch the other boys play games) in their room, instead, he sat on the couch, next to me almost all evening until his bed time. Several times we would catch each others eye and he would smile. I love that smile.

I think sometimes we forget, especially if you have mutiple children, that they need and crave time and attention from us as their parents. I believe that we get so caught up in everday life that we often neglect something that is so easy and so fulfilling - spending one on one time with our children. While I would have rather him not have been hurt at all, I suspect that maybe God took this opportunity to remind me how special and wonderful my children are and how much I love being with them. No expectations, no schoolwork, no chores... just Mommy and Me. I am so blessed to have them and lately more and more He has been sending me little reminders of how much they love and need me and how much I NEED and cherish them!!

CHOMP! CHOMP!

2007-01-08T22:28:00.000-08:00

Aaron, I know you are THRILLED right now. Be careful with all that cloud jumping I know you are doing!

CHAMPS, BABY!!! CHOMP! CHOMP!!!!

GATORS! GATORS! GATORS!

Menu Plan Monday

2007-01-08T07:32:00.000-08:00

Time to get back on track since things have calmed down somewhat!

This is from Organizing Junkie

Monday - Florida Gators Game at my Parents - Fried Chicken
Tuesday - Pork Chops & Rice
Wednesday - BBQ Chicken & Corn on the Cob
Thursday - Out to Eat
Friday - Meatloaf
Saturday - Spaghetti, Salad & Garlic Bread
Sunday - Pork Roast, Potatoes & Cabbage

New Year... New Decisions...

2007-01-07T21:40:00.000-08:00

After the service today I went and picked the baby up from nursery and the two youngest boys up from Christ's Crusaders. Before putting them in the car, I decided to make my way back to the foyer to talk to the Pastor. I told him we were ready to discuss membership with him. So, it looks like the end of this month we will start our membership classes and by the beginning of next month we will be members! I am so excited and a little nervous. I have not been a member anywhere since my oldest was born 13 years ago. YIKES!

As the pastor said in his sermon today, we all have a thirst for worship and while other things may give us "Snickers short term Satisfaction" only the Lord Jesus Christ can quench that thirst! This year is sure to bring new things for our family.

Through great saddness, comes great joy. The decision was one I had been grappling with but the events of the past month made it for me. My greatest comfort has been from my faith in Him and the knowledge that my brother was welcomed with opened arms.

Heigh Ho - Heigh Ho... Back to School...

2007-01-04T21:50:00.000-08:00

Time to start with school work again. We haven't done anything since the week Aaron passed so getting started back was a bit of a chore for all! But, we made it through - not without a few bumps - hopefully next week will be better. I am still up in air about the history program we are using but the boys seem to be enjoying it so I guess I shouldn't complain too much. LOL We are just about finished with Treasure Island and will be starting a new group read aloud book. I thought it was going to be Tuck Everlasting but I am unsure now. I don't know if I should pick something more upbeat first or not. Decisions... decisions... oh and SUGGESTIONS are always appreciated.

T is standing now on her own in the middle the floor. She will get to standing, clap her hands and smile. If you go anywhere near her she will sit down. No walking yet but it should be soon.

I am hoping to get to talk to the Pastor this Sunday about joining the church we have been visiting. I am ashamed to say that we haven't been since all of this happened and I know we are all missing it and needing it.

Me? Well, I am still really sad and trying so hard to cope. I am wondering if I need to talk to my doctor. For some reason I worry that I am not handling this as well as I should. It could just be my imagination but some days I cry 100 times about 100 things. And I see Aaron everywhere - everything reminds me of him. I am told that is normal but MAN, this hurts so bad. I can't even begin to describe it. It is hard to fathom not being able to see him or hug him. I miss you and love you and wish you were here!

Faces...

2007-01-03T20:37:00.000-08:00

The NEW DOLL face and Jack Sparrow.

Tat Crazy!

2007-01-03T18:56:00.000-08:00

Aaron had lots of tats, he loved them!! He certainly used them to express himself. So, since one of his best friends is a tat artist, he offered to do memorial Florida Gators for everyone in our family. I didn't think my Mom would get one but she called me the other day and said she was ready! My Dad, who works nights and is never on standby was put on standby last night. He went too because he said that was a sign it was meant for him to have one! LOL My Mom got hers on her shoulder blade, Dad and Big D got theirs on their ankles and I got mine on my chest above my right... ummm, well, you know. LOL It can be covered which is all my Mom was worried about. I was so proud of my Mom, it was outside of her comfort zone for sure but Aaron was her heart and it was done with such love.

So, here is a picture of D's. I think it looks really good. I know Aaron was smiling down on us and loving that we were getting them. Aaron, I miss you more each day and love you with all my heart!!!

~Happy New Year!~

2006-12-31T20:40:00.000-08:00

Heres to a better year in 2007! 2006 was okay up until this last month. We ate blackeyed peas at my parents tonight and she commented that she hopes they bring her luck next year as they didn't do a very good job this last year.

We are all still trying to deal with my brother's absence. It is very heartbreaking. We miss you, Aaron.

Our angel...

2006-12-18T07:37:00.000-08:00

Little D just got up. He came into the livingroom all bleary eyed and said to me - "Mommy, I saw Uncle Aaron with his big pretty wings and he is at Mya's house (my Mom)". It took everything I had not to cry. I can't wait to tell my Mom when I talk to her. Out of the mouths of babes.

Aaron...

2006-12-15T20:13:00.000-08:00

He was a son, a brother, a grandson, an uncle, a nephew, a cousin and a friend. He was the light of our lives. He was always smiling and always so laid back. He never met a stranger. He was loved... he is loved. He will be missed forever. He is my brother and he left us on Tuesday. This isn't goodbye, Aaron, I will see you again.

Rest in Peace, "Raaron Aaron", I love you.
November 24, 1977 - December 12, 2006

Menu Plan Monday

2006-12-11T10:08:00.000-08:00

This is from Organizing Junkie

Monday - Meatloaf & Rice
Tuesday - Soup & Sandwiches
Wednesday - Pineapple Chicken
Thursday - Out to Eat
Friday - Sausage, Red Beans & Rice with Cornbread
Saturday - Pork Chops
Sunday - Russian Chicken

Puppy Love...

2006-12-10T21:28:00.000-08:00

We live in a fairly good sized apartment complex. Since my boys are homeschooled, I encourage them to play outside with the kids that live around us. Next door is a man and a woman who have 3 children. It is a his, hers and theirs situation. The oldest child is a girl (his)- she is 11 and in 5th grade. She is taller and bigger than my 12 year old and is, from what I can tell, a tomboy. She is a really sweet little girl. She comes over quite a bit. In fact, her brother and sister never come over even though the brother is close in age to my oldest. Anyway, my 12 year old seemed to be the one she was really hanging with and now he talks about her all the time. When his Dad was here last week, I guess he mentioned her. ExDh ask me all about her telling me that T said they are "buddies" which is better than just friends. ExDh thought that was a little strange and told me I should probably talk to him. So, I did. I ask what "buddies" meant and he told me that she told him that since she tells him her deepest secrets (I don't remember having those at 11 - lol) they are "buddies". He said he isn't sure what that means other than they are best friends. I ask if they were like boyfriend/girlfriend and he told me he didn't know. Tonight while we were eating dinner T mentioned her again and Big D said "You SURE do talk about her a lot." T just shrugged. Then D says "have you kissed her?" T didn't blush and didn't skip a beat before answering No. I said he better NOT be kissing her and he said "but you do it" D and I looked at each other and I said "When? Tell me when?" By this time everyone was laughing and T told me that he sees us kiss every night before bed. Oldest DS spoke up and said "Yeah but that is like she kisses US!" LOL You can tell the level of romance at MY house. ;o)

I am not sure what to make of this new situation. I have wondered a little why the parents don't seem concerned that she is over here so much. I did tell them previously that I didn't mind her coming over so I guess that must be why. I just wonder if she talks as much about him as he does about her. I don't think I am ready for this phase. ~sigh~

Ornament Finish

2006-12-07T20:57:00.000-08:00

I usually shy away from anything that requires finishing because I am not very good at it. But, this year, I decided to try my hand with perforated paper. I am in an ornament exchange for people who had babies in Sept 2000 so I have know these gals awhile. Hopefully, my partner will like this but if not, I am sending a bought ornie too - just in case. LOL

The days without my boys...

2006-12-06T21:45:00.000-08:00

Matthew 19:13-15
Then children were brought to him that he might lay his hands on them and pray. The disciples rebuked the people; but Jesus said, "Let the children come to me, and do not hinder them; for to such belongs the kingdom of heaven." And he laid his hands on them and went away.

I am often curious about the reaction I get from people when the children say they are homeschooled. Usually, people wonder and comment on being with my children all of the time and whether I am in need of a "break" from them. When thinking of the verses in Matthew, I wonder if perhaps the disciples were trying to keep the children away so that they would not bother or disrupt Jesus. I find it comforting to know that in his eyes they are no bother. His love is big enough for all. As a mother and as a Christian trying my best to be more like him, I cherish the time I have with my children. I am sad when they are away and even in my most trying times, I step back. He gave me these children as a gift and he never takes a "break" from me no matter how difficult I may be at times. I am thankful for his love and thankful for my children.

Tomorrow my older boys come home after having spent 3 days with their Dad. I have missed them so much and have spent most of the time thinking of them. Even with only half of my kiddos gone, the emptyness is evident. We all miss them and I can't wait to have them home. I can only imagine that He misses all of his children as well and can't wait for us to come home.

It's official!

2006-12-04T10:23:00.000-08:00

I have decided that I am, for a fact, a homeschooling Mom! When did I come to this decision, what thing pushed me over, what could possibly have made me think that YES, we are a homeschooling family??? I think it may have been this morning, while during my dry off and dress for the day, my son was on the other side of the locked bathroom door not being able to wait for me to come out. What were we discussing that couldn't wait? Why, the contradictions in Charlemagne's life, of course! Ahhh, isn't life grand?? ;o)

Dashing through December...

2006-11-30T19:40:00.000-08:00

So at the end of each month I print out a calendar for the next month and write down everything coming up. Once I have it all down, I transfer it to the big eraseable calendar that hangs in our dining room. I am little behind this month since I haven't been feeling well but boy do we have lots on tap.

Tomorrow we have a park day with our homeschool group, Christmas parade and craft fair on Saturday and church on Sunday. Monday D & T's Dad comes into town to keep them for a few days. T turns 12 on the 6th (man, am I getting OLD) AND we have a field trip on Thursday.

Between field trips, rec days, holiday parties, parades, church, etc we are packed! And, I couldn't be happier. This is my favorite time of year and this year I get to do it like I always dreamed we could. Decorating, baking, wrapping presents... we get to do everything together. I am so blessed.

"Mommy, I LIKE going to school with you!"

2006-11-29T20:09:00.000-08:00

LOL

Music to my ears today. Little D is doing pretty well, I think. He doesn't sit and do long periods of work but instead does 2 or 3 worksheets, plays for while, reads a few books, plays some more and then comes back for more workheets. I am already pulling 1st grade worksheets for him in Math and while I was planning on buying a boxed curriculum to start with him after Christmas, I now hesitate because I think a K set may be a waste of money. Guess I need to start researching again. Fun, fun...

On another note I heard a new tactic today for trying to "talk" me out of homeschooling. Mom told me that she was discussing me pulling D out this week with a friend of hers who said "Goodness, she has 12 more years to go!" Mom said "I didn't even THINK about it until she said it... that is a LONG time!" I chuckled a little and let her keep talking. Actually, as big D and I discussed tonight, I have about 18 more years of it since T is only a year old. But, hey, no need to mention that just yet.

But, truth be known, I have to give Mom some credit it was a nice try and actually not one I had heard before... A for effort. hehehehe

I am getting used to it and we are all getting better with our comebacks. After my Meme saw Dr Phil the other day she told us all about the girl who had her life ruined because she wasn't prom queen or cheerleader. D looked at me and said "Wow, good thing D probably won't want to be either of those things!"

Irritated...

2006-11-28T20:12:00.000-08:00

The main reason my Mom didn't want me to bring Little D home to school was because she has been SOOOO worried about it taking away from the older boys who have been doing so well. Not to say it has been all sunshine and roses - in fact, I have still been having some of the same problems with my middle son that we had in school. He is famous for not finishing things or just writing aimlessly but we have been working on it. Well, I brought Little D home on Monday and have been working with him some. BUT, I have been really sick since Saturday and have napping anytime the baby does because I feel so awful. Usually, I check work every night and anything that isn't done, I reassign for the next day with a stern note and some game time taken away. Last night, I didn't check because I went to bed when they did. Today, when I ask T if he had finished everything he assured me he had - I even ask about two very long Math sheets I know he had to do and again, he told me yes, he had. Tonight, since I had a burst of energy, I sat down to check work. Well, T did about 10% of his work from yesterday and less than that today. No Math has been done for either day. I am livid. Various reasons of course, one because he flat out lied when I ask but also because he has taken complete advantage of my not feeling well. Of course, I can't tell my Mom because she defends him about everything and will tell me it is because D is home. I know for a fact that isn't it. This would have happened regardless. I did wake him up and tell him no games, no tv and no outside until next week. Tomorrow he and I will having a LONG talk and I will go back to checking each assignment as he finishes it each day. I hate having to do that but I don't know what else to do. Grrrrr.... off to take more meds and get some sleep. Tomorrow is going to be a LONG day!

Menu Plan Monday

2006-11-27T16:46:00.000-08:00

This is from Organizing Junkie

Monday - Ham Fried Rice & Eggrolls (since I didn't make it last week)
Tuesday - Golden Chicken & Noodles (from Taste of Home)
Wednesday - Spaghetti Casserole
Thursday - Out to Eat
Friday - Peachy-Keen Chicken
Saturday - Meatloaf
Sunday - Chicken & Cornbread Stuffing Casserole

I did it...

2006-11-27T06:32:00.000-08:00

I went and withdrew little D from school this morning. It finally took older D telling me on Saturday - YES, JUST DO IT! LOL

The office staff was nice and friendly until they ask where we were moving to and I said 'nowhere'. When they found out we would be homeschooling they became a little short and exchanged looks with pursed lips.

Oh, well, we are now a house full of homeschoolers. :o) I feel soooo much better now.

School... sometimes it makes me shake my head!

2006-11-21T15:00:00.000-08:00

Today was little D's Thanksgiving program. He was a pilgrim!! I just couldn't get over the amount of kindergarten kids they have in the school. His teacher approached me again about if I was *really* taking him out of school and if so, it was going to be after Christmas, right? When I told her No, it would be after Thanksgiving she told me all the fun things they would be doing during the holidays. ~sigh~

On another note I got a letter from the school telling me that he has missed 3 days. The letter said after 3 more I would get another letter and at 10 days I would have attend some truancy class. Strange!

Want to see some pictures???

2006-11-20T20:51:00.000-08:00

T enjoying Menu Plan on Monday - LOL

Mommy and Miss T

Worksheets Little D did on his own tonight. Exactly why we will be taking him out! His class won't get to this level until Spring of next year!!

Menu Plan Monday

2006-11-20T11:37:00.000-08:00

This is from Organizing Junkie

Monday - Spaghetti with meatsauce, salad, garlic bread
Tuesday - Creamed Chicken & Rice (didn't get to this last week)
Wednesday - Hamburgers
Thursday - Thanksgiving!!!
Friday - Out to Eat
Saturday - Leftovers (maybe Ham Fried Rice - just saw this on someone else's and went YUMM - lol)
Sunday - Crockpot Pineapple Chicken*

I made porkchops like this last week, everyone was licking their plates so I am going to see how coverting it to chicken works. It is basically desired meat, can of diced pineapples (with juice), brown sugar and soy sauce.

I HATE BANKS!!!

2006-11-18T07:42:00.000-08:00

A few months back I back I had some major problems with my bank. I spent 2 days on the phone with them and finally ended up with an apology from a supervisor and a straightening out of my account. At that time D begged me to go to his credit union and drop the bank. I told him no, I was going to stay because while it was a hassel at the time, they had fixed it. Well, my Dad who also had an account with them at the time changed banks because he said they were idgits - LOL! I guess I should have listened. I have spent all morning on the phone with the bank, once again. The same thing that happened last time has happened again. The girl, however, says that this time it is not their fault and is telling me something completely different than the supervisor told me last time. Grrrr.... I ask her if there had been a policy change from a few months ago and she told me no. When I recounted my experience last time she told me that obviously the supervisor apologized and fixed things just to be nice! HUH????

All of this is over 73 cents and the date posted on their online which apparently doesn't reflect when something is actually paid!!! I am livid. I guess I will be sheepishly asking D to take me over to his credit union next week. I hate having to start over with a new bank. :o(

The Clothing Fairy...

2006-11-16T21:14:00.000-08:00

Today the kids and I stopped at the library to return and check out books. As we were leaving I saw T asking a lady politely to be excused as she was standing in front of the drop book for returned books. I noticed that after speaking to him and apologizing that she was sizing him up.

We went out to the car, the boys got in and I was hooking in the baby. Suddenly I hear "Excuse me, Miss?" I turn around and it is the same lady from inside pulled up behind me in a top of the line SUV. She apologizes for being so forward and says that something possessed her to stop me. She said that she was on her way to take some clothes her son had outgrown to the local private school for a sale. Apparently, T looked to be a little smaller than her son and she said that she would love to leave them with me if I would like them. She explained that they were all pressed and hung on hangers and again said she was sorry for approaching me. She kept saying that something was telling her to approach me.

I told her that I would be happy to have them if she was sure it was okay. She got out of her car, opened the back and pulled out a bunch of hangers. On them were two what appear to be almost brand new pairs of Gap jeans and 6 nicely pressed short sleeved shirts. I told her that I would be happy to take them and thanked her over and over. When I got in the car and took a closer look I realized that everything was perfectly sized and that the shirts were nice button down and golf type shirts from Polo, Hilfiger, etc. I was stunned. Having 4 kiddos, these aren't brands I buy. Shoot, who I am kidding, the stores I shop in don't even carry those brands - LOL! Just kidding! But, seriously, these are really nice clothes.

I had to smile as I told my Mom and D of my good fortune. I found it funny how she kept saying that something told her to stop me. Since we have become more active in the church, I have been looking to buy the boys some nicer shirts than the teen uniform of t-shirts they live in - LOL. While we can afford to buy new shirts (not these brands but new), I am happy that we now have some nice, gently used clothes and that the money I was planning on using for that can now roll into Christmas.

God does provide and sometimes where you least expect it.

Prayers All Around...

2006-11-13T20:32:00.000-08:00

My post is an unusual one, I think. I would merely like to ask that you keep some very dear and special people to me in your thoughts and prayers. They each have their own battles and own hurts. Knowing they are in pain hurts me tremendously.

First, my DB who is going through a really rough time right now. I don't think he realizes how when an door closes a window opens. I don't think spiritually he knows where to *look*. He is in a lot of pain right now and I wish that I could make it go away. For now, he is shutting everyone out and dealing with it on his own. I pray for his safety and his sanity. As of now, I fear the destructive path he is on...

Second, a very dear friend of mine is going through a rough time. Turning to me in a time of crisis, for which I am very honored, I did my best to offer support and suggestions. I will praying with my friend tonight as I know they are needed. I am asking God to grant my friend the strength needed to handle whatever may happen. I love you, dear friend and want you to know that I am always here to lend a shoulder and an ear.

And lastly, I myself am in a bit of a quandry - stuck between two sides - two sets of people whom I love very dearly. I would never want to choose between one and the other. I know it isn't intentional on their parts but sometimes I feel as though they want me to make a choice. It isn't fair and it is very painful. Sometimes I don't think they realize how difficult it is for me. I cried my fair share of tears today. I have also prayed a lot and I am hoping that some guidance comes soon and that both sides of this issue can some to terms before it makes me go insane.

Thank you for any prayers and good thoughts you can offer. Life is a very funny, exciting and sometimes scary thing. Faith and Love are two of strongest forces I know .

Menu Plan Monday

2006-11-13T05:25:00.000-08:00

This is from Organizing Junkie

Monday - BBQ Sausage
Tuesday - Hamburgers & Hot Dogs
Wednesday - Out to Eat
Thursday - Pork Roast
Friday - Meatballs
Saturday - Creamed Chicken & Rice
Sunday - Make Your Own Pizzas

Extra - Pumpkin Chocolate Chip Muffins

My November Goals...

2006-11-11T21:15:00.000-08:00

What I want to do - not what will actually happen. ROTFL

1) Finish or get close to finishing the wedding piece for D's friends
2) Stitch bookmarks for boys stockings
3) Finish fishy flatfold for Little D's room
4) FINALLY start on Mom's camel for Christmas
5) Buy at least half of the presents needed for the kids
6) Purchase some more books for when I bring Little D home to homeschool
7) Clean up/rearrange living room for tree AND recliner I want to get D for Christmas
8) Make out holiday *baking plans* so boys can help out
9) Move T to crib for good (not just sometimes like now)
10) Rearrange pantry for holiday grocery shopping

I am sure there are more but that is all I can think of right now. ;o)

My son the author! hehehe

2006-11-10T08:47:00.000-08:00

Some of you know the school deal with little D so I have been working with him at home until we take him out. Well, he has been writing his "vocabulary/sight" words for several weeks now. They are A, The, Said, My, That, Are, Is, etc. He is also reading short books. Beyond that he hasn't really written anything at school or here. So, last night he sitting on the couch next to me and he is writing his sight words for the millionth time. I tell him we should write some sentences. That intrigued him so he ask what I meant. I explained that he could write some sentences like The car is fast. Hmmm... he likes this idea. I also explain about the period and what it does. So he then writes some sentences: The cat is fat. That dog is bad. The car is red. My feet smell. (lol) He is so excited. We are excited and making a HUGE deal over it. So I tell him. Wow, you can write a story!!! You can tell his mind is reeling. His eyes get huge and his mouth drops open. He looks at me and Daddy and says "Ohhh, I can write a BOOK!" Gotta love a man with high expectations.

Daddy was VERY impressed because it took all of about 15 mins and he when little D left to tell the boys he turned to me and said "And all he does at school is take the test".

Here is a picture of the sheet he just brought me.

And here HE is in this Veteran's Day stuff!

Heyyyy... Baby!

2006-11-08T21:22:00.000-08:00

I forgot what it was like when they start understanding and trying to talk. T is hysterical to all us! She will point to a baby doll and say "Baby" and we will say "Oh, that's a baby!' To which she always shakes her head and says "YES!" hehehehe And when you walk into a room she will say "HEYYYY" - it is sooo cute! Oh, and eye. When you ask her where her eye is she will touch her nose and laugh. When you say "NO, that's your NOSE!" She will then put her finger to her eye and say "Yes, EYE!"

Now she has also started cruising and trying to stand up in the middle of the room not holding on to anything. I think it won't be too long now before she starts walking. I told the boys they needed to look out when that happens! LOL

Between her antics and little D wanting sound out and read everything there is never a dull OR quiet moment around here. I LOVE IT!

Happiness

2006-11-07T20:35:00.000-08:00

How do you measure happy? How can you tell if you are happy? Not in a sense of content and cared for but really and truly happy? I am plagued all the time by what ifs. What if I had not divorced my ExDH? Of course the obvious of not having Little D and Miss T but beyond that... what if I got back with him one day? Would it be better? Would I hate myself for leaving in the first place? I did almost go back one time but didn't and now have so much to show for my choice. What if I had kept my job and not decided to homeschool? The obvious of the boys still being in school, T being in daycare, me being unhappy with the job but beyond that... what if I never go back to work? Or, when I want to, what if I can't find a job? I think that somewhere in my mind I know that I worry too much. Ok, that isn't accurate, I guess. I mean, I KNOW I worry too much and much of the time it is about things that I have no control over. I need to stop second guessing and be content in my decisions, not look back and look forward and above all satified with who I am and what I have without doubt! I feel like I am happy with all of that but wonder if my constant what if problem clouds my happiness. Hmmmm... interesting thought.

I love D and my children with all of my heart. I love my family and my friends. I love my life and I love that I am able to stay with my kids and learn from them and with them. Love is happiness as far as I can tell. Can you be happy and have doubt? Well, I think that is inevitable. We are human afterall and not without fault. Maybe I am wrong... great, one more thing to worrying about. LOL

Thought I would try to join in this week!

2006-11-06T07:32:00.000-08:00

I thought I would try this week and see if I can stick to it. LOL This is from Organizing Junkie

Monday (soccer night) - Spaghetti, Salad and Bread
Tuesday - Pancakes and Sausage
Wednesday - Chicken & Gravy with rice
Thurday (soccer night) - Hamburgers
Friday - Smoked Sausage & Potatoes
Saturday - Out to Eat or Pulled Pork Egg Rolls if I am feeling brave - LOL
Sunday - Fiesta Meatloaf (on Laura's menu and just looked Yummy)

Back to the grind and WAYYYY too much candy!

2006-11-05T21:20:00.000-08:00

We went to Target tonight to pick up a few things. Leave it to us to go when they are marking the Halloween candy 75% off. We got a TON of candy for $11 - we are talking about a dozen plus bags. No clue what we will do with it all but D just kept loading more into the cart ~sigh~. He is horrible to shop with, I mean, last time I took him with me to Target we ended up with one of those Thanksgiving editions of the Jones Sodas. You know, the one that has flavors like Turkey & Dressing, Sweet Potato and Peas? Yuck!!! Not sure what he plans to do with it just yet.

Tomorrow we get back to somewhat normal. Two soccer games and ExDh is coming down for D's game. He hasn't seen him play. He is so excited about getting to come. He is an avid soccer player and is upset that he isn't around to help out, coach, etc. His best friend (D's godfather) was a player on the Austria soccer team years back and was one of the top ranked players over there. So, needless to say, soccer is a HUGE deal. We get along very well and it is always nice to see him. I don't think Daddy D sees it that way but oh well, the boys love that we get along and so do I!

My Mom just sent me an email titled "Natural Highs" and here is the list...
1. Falling in love.
2. Laughing so hard your face hurts.
3. A hot shower
4. No lines at the supermarket.
5. A special glance.
6. Getting mail.
7. Taking a drive on a pretty road.
8. Hearing your favorite song on the radio.
9. Lying in bed listening to the rain outside.
10. Hot towels fresh out of the dryer.
11. Chocolate milkshake (vanilla or strawberry).
12. A bubble bath.
13. Giggling.
14. A good conversation.
15. The beach
16. Finding a 20 dollar bill in your coat from last winter.
17. Laughing at yourself.
18. Looking into their eyes and knowing they Love you
19. Midnight phone calls that last for hours.
20. Running through sprinklers.
21. Laughing for absolutely no reason at all.
22. Having someone tell you that you're beautiful.
23. Laughing at an inside joke.
24. Friends.
25. Accidentally overhearing someone say something nice about you.
26 Waking up and realizing you still have a few hours left to sleep.
27. Your first kiss (either the very first or with a new partner).
28. Making new friends or spending time with old ones.
29. Playing with a new puppy.
30. Having someone play with your hair.
31. Sweet dreams.
32. Hot chocolate.
33. Road trips with friends.
34. Swinging on swings.
35. Making eye contact with a cute stranger.
36. Making chocolate chip cookies.
37. Having your friends send you homemade cookies.
38 Holding hands with someone you care about.
39. Running into an old friend and realizing that some things (good or bad) never change.
40. Watching the expression on someone's face as they open a much desired present from you.
41. Watching the sunrise.
42. Getting out of bed every morning and being grateful for another beautiful day.
43. Knowing that somebody misses you.
44. Getting a hug from someone you care about deeply.
45. Knowing you've done the right thing, no matter what other people think.

The last one made me smile. She was really unhappy when we first started homeschooling although she admits now that it is working for us. BUT, she doesn't agree that I should bring little D home this year - she thinks we should keep him in school until next year. I find it interesting that she sent me this with a note about #45... I guess even when she disagrees, she knows I will make the right decision. Gotta love her!!!

Watching her sleep...

2006-11-04T20:44:00.000-08:00

Forgive me while I drift a bit... I am sitting here and a few feet away from me my precious baby girl is sound asleep. Her little feet crossed at the ankles - her perfect little toes peeking out from the ends of her princess pjs. She is so beautiful, I almost want to cry. I have done so much in my life that I am not proud of and so many more things that I would never want anyone to know about and it makes me wonder... what in this world did I do to deserve this precious little angel? This perfect little one from God. Was she sent to save me? What she sent to remind me what things are most important? She is never far from me. I just can't bear it. Even at night, I sleep as close to her as I can. It is so strange. I don't remember being like this before she came along. I love my children and they are the most important people in my life. I had my boys and they were wonderful and perfect and I could not have ask for anything more. Sometimes, I think, I took for granted that they were around. I didn't realize the special gift I had been given. I didn't think I could love any more than I did when I looked at my three boys. But, he knew, somehow he realized that we were not complete, I was not complete. She came at a most unexpected time and I could not be any more thankful. I smile as I look at her, the sweet little face of pure joy. I don't know what I would be without her. She is making me a better Mother. I better person. She will look to me as an example of how to be a woman. For that reason, I must be sure to be the best person I can. I imagine that in 10 years she will probably not think as much of me as she does now. But I know that that will pass. I doubt she will long to be wrapped in my arms, sit outside the bathroom door whimpering and follow me down the hall wanting attention as she does now. At one time I would have thought that a little annoying... I would have relished the thought of having a few me moments. But they are no longer needed... I don't need any moments that are me - I only need moments that are 'we' - me and my kiddos. I wish she could stay this way for longer than just a year. She is a wonder to me. She brings out the very best in all of us. She brings a smile to her Daddy's face that is reserved only for her. She lights up when her two oldest brothers come into a room and they light up as well. They argue over who get to hold her next. My youngest acts a fool for her and she rewards him with a fit of giggles. There is no jealousy. There are no complaints. Oh, I know there will be as she gets older but right now, we all enjoy her so much. When I married D and had little D, there was something not quite right. It was us and them as far as my older boys were concerned but now we are all Us... and she is a big part of that. She is stirring now and in a bit I will go and cover her up again. Brush her hair out of her face and run my fingers over her tiny little toes. During the night I will wake up several times just to check on her. Tomorrow morning she will wake me with her cries and I will smile. When she throws cereal on the floor, unbobbins all my thread and says "Uhhh - ohhhh" as she pulls dvds out of the entertainment center, I will smile. She brings out the best in all of us and she doesn't even know it. She is truly a blessing for our family. Wonderful, beautiful, perfect... I love her so much. Thank you for believing in me and trusting me and blessing me. I am the luckiest person in the world and it only took one little beautiful face to make me see it. And her face makes me appreciate it all... the tough times, the trying time, my life, my loves and most of all being a Mom to the most intelligent, beautiful, precious children in the world. Thanks for the reminder - I will cherish it always.

Book Worm

2006-11-03T19:50:00.000-08:00

I used to be an avid reader. My oldest son is following me. We went to library yesterday and he checked out book 4 in the Pendragon series. He started it the second we left yesterday and finished it today. He is always anxious to write his book reports and told me tonight that he could hardly wait until Monday. LOL

While we were there getting some books on the Middle Ages, I walked through the adult section to find the cross stitch books. Well, on a table I saw a section set up which included the book "The Mermaid Chair" by Sue Monk Kidd. I had seen the previews for the movie that starred Kim Basinger but never actually watched it. So, I decided to check it out figuring that if I found the time I would read it but if not I would return it in 2 weeks just like so many other books. LOL

Today when I took the boys to park day I stuck the book in the diaper bag at the last moment. We got to the park at 1:00 pm and I started it shortly after. Needless to say, I finished it about an hour ago. Aside from driving, cooking dinner and two diaper changes, I did not put it down. I read straight through and was bawling like a baby at the end. I haven't read a book straight through in forever. WOW! It is an AWESOME book. I love the writing style. She doesn't dumb things down - she uses words and phrases and topics that intelligent women will relate to!!! THANK YOU!

Next week we are going back so that D can get book 5 and I will be checking out her first book "The Secret Life of Bees". I will let you know how it is! LOL

The list spreads like wildfire...

2006-11-01T13:17:00.000-08:00

Never fails. The same thing happens every time. Someone posts on the first day of the month "Hoffman's is up!" Usually, I am good. I don't kill myself to get there. I take my time, usually waiting until the second or third day before I wander over to take a look. (snicker inserted here) Whether it is the first or the third day, it's always the same. I scan the list. In my mind I think "Nahhh... nothing this month, for sure!" Then I go back, looking this time specifically for the ones I know might have something I HAVE to have... I click and I look. I make notes, I ALWAYS make notes. Never fails. After that, I go back to the beginning of the list, this time clicking all, even ones I KNOW won't have anything that appeals to me and most of the time (notice I said most) they don't have anything I am dying for - that, is a good thing. Has there ever been a month where there is nothing I want or need or have to have? No, not one that I can recall. There is always ONE at least ONE.

This month? Well, I went over at the first posting. This time I was certain there would be none. Scan, click, back to the top, click, click, click, click. Annnddddd, there it is. One I HAVE to have. ~sigh~ Off to my crazy list... oh well, there is always next month. I have hope. ;o)

When things aren't as they seem...

2006-10-31T18:19:00.000-08:00

We went to the Trunk or Treat at church tonight. I finally had a chance to talk to the pastor for a bit. He brought his wife over to meet me and I thought it odd that she didn't know me. Later, as D and I talked I said that perhaps it wasn't her and I was losing my mind... We saw the pastor again and I am still reeling from our conversation. Sometimes things just aren't as they seem. His wife is not who I am thinking, although, D looked at my senior memory book tonight and agreed that the person I thought she was looks A LOT like her. The rest of the story is unsettling and I am still trying to wrap my mind around it.

I do think this is the church for us and I am glad we went. The Pastor told me that as soon as we were ready to discuss membership to let him know. I am thinking we may be ready soon. I will continue to pray on it.